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So I decided to make a carrot cake to welcome back my friend Carol from a long medical leave, but I realized I was out of a few key ingredients. Carrots, for one. R “volunteered” to go to the store for me (I had to bribe him with promises of cake). Here’s the list I wrote out:


1 lb carrots

1 dz large brown eggs

2 – cream cheese

Gallon of skim milk

Potato chips (I had a craving, okay?)


Call 1:

G: Hey, I forgot, I also need sour cream for the frosting.

R: Okay


Call 2:

R: Um, what kind of carrots?

G: I don’t care, whatever

R: Baby carrots? Organic? Peeled, unpeeled?

G: Peeled baby carrots is fine.

R: They have a 5 lb bag.

G: No, 1lb is all I need.


Call 3:

R: What kind of eggs?

G: Large brown eggs.

R: But what brand?

G: Whole foods brand is fine

R: Okay, I’m checking the eggs now. Oh, this dozen has a broken one.

G: So grab another dozen.

R: Okay.


Call 4:

R: What brand of cream cheese?

G: Whole foods brand is fine

R: Okay.


Call 5:

R: What kind of milk?

G: Skim. I wrote it on the list.

R: What brand?

G: Whole foods brand is fine.

R: Okay.


Call 6:

R: What kind of potato chips?

G: I don’t care, Whole foods brand is fine.

R: Why do you want potato chips, anyways?

G: I have a craving. I want to finish the half-sours.

R: There’s Whole foods sea salt and black pepper.

G: No pepper, just salted is fine.

R: I don’t see any.

G: They are there, just look harder.

R: Oh, I found them. Okay.

G: Hey, did you remember the sour cream?

R: Crap, that’s back by the dairy section, isn’t it?

G: Yup.


Call 7:

R: How much sour cream?

G: 8 ounces is good.

R: They don’t have 8 oz.

G: 16 is fine

R: That’s a pound, right?

G: Yes.

R: What kind of sour cream cheese?

G: Whole foods brand is fine.

R: They don’t have it.

G: Friendship is good, too.

R: Okay


So, 7 phone calls for 6 items. Sometimes I think R does it on purpose so that I won't send him to the store. I hope Carol appreciates the pain involved in making her cake.


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